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Hey Reader, A few weeks ago I talked about the Crab Mentality and how to stop your circle from holding you back financially. But what if the person holding you back… is actually you? The hard part is that you probably don’t realize you’re doing it. Lately, I’ve seen a lot of comments and messages along the lines of:
And sometimes those feelings are valid. Rent is up 30%, but incomes have only climbed 20%. And since 2021, prices have been rising faster than paychecks. But here’s the unfortunate news: focusing only on what’s wrong keeps you stuck. So how do you face an economy that keeps making it harder to get ahead without getting stuck in negativity? That’s why today I want to talk about Victim Mentality—what it is and how to stop it from squashing your potential. Victim Mentality, ExplainedVictim Mentality is the mindset of “everything’s against me” or “nothing is really my fault.” In personal finance, it shows up like this:
And I want to acknowledge that some people really do have it tougher. That might mean being born into poverty, dealing with health problems, or having to take care of older family members. But study after study in Psychology shows 1 truth: Victim Mentality makes hard situations even harder to escape. There’s a famous study from the 1960s by psychologist Martin Seligman that makes this clear (back when animal research ethics weren’t what they are today). Dogs were given small shocks in harnesses. Some could stop them by pressing a lever, others had no control. Later, all the dogs were placed in a box where they could easily escape by jumping over a barrier. The ones who’d had control before jumped to safety. The others just laid there and took the shocks, even though escape was right in front of them. That’s learned helplessness in action. The idea that nothing you do matters, even when it 100% does. And beyond keeping you stuck, it’s a way to avoid doing the work. It’s easier to hide behind a “there’s no point” than to make a change. So here are 3 strategies to help you get unstuck. 1. Take responsibilityTaking responsibility with money just means believing you can do something to make your situation better. Sure, there’s a lot you can’t control: politics, tariffs, the economy, even how the people around you act. But there are always things you can control. And believing that matters. A study in Germany looked at families in the bottom 25% income bracket and found 1 key difference: the ones who believed their actions mattered saved 40–60% more than those who just accepted their situation. Same income, same struggles—the difference was that these families were actually trying to make the best decisions they could. What you can do: Pick 1 thing you actually control in your money life like setting up a budget or deciding where to keep your savings. Then ask yourself: what’s 1 small change I can make today to improve this? If it’s budgeting, the key is finding a system you’ll actually stick with. This video is a great place to start. I show you step-by-step the easiest way to manage your money. 2. Practice resilienceResilience is your ability to bounce back when things don’t go your way. Instead of treating obstacles or rejections as proof that you’re stuck, see them as part of the process. Take job hunting. You start out excited, send a few applications…and then get ghosted. It feels like proof you’re not qualified, so you stop trying. But the unfortunate truth is that it takes 30 to 200 applications to land just 1 offer. Resilience means you keep adjusting, learning, and trying again until something sticks. What you can do: Use the 1-to-1 rule. For every setback, write down something you learned. That way, every “failure” becomes a learning opportunity. For example, if you went over budget this month try to figure out where you can make adjustments instead of sitting frustration. 3. Build momentumMomentum just means that once something’s moving, it’s easier to keep it going and even speed up. Think about running. The first few runs feel brutal, but as you build stamina, each one gets easier and you go farther with less effort. Money works the same way. Investing your first $100 is way harder than investing the next $1,000 because you have to figure out how to budget, where to put it, and build the habit. But once you do it once, your brain has proof it can be done. What you can do: Focus on quick wins. A quick win tells your brain, “this is possible.” One of the best places to start is with debt. If you focus on becoming “debt-free” from the start, it feels overwhelming. But if you zero in on your smallest debt, that feels doable. And once that’s gone, it’s much easier to keep going. Last week I shared 4 of my favorite quick money wins. The good news is you can still check them out here and save some serious $$$ this week. To making smarter money moves, Vincent Chan Cool things from this week
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